Haiku Review: Liverpool 1 - 1 Arsenal

A new feature this year for Hipster Gooner is the post-match haiku review. Never has football writing so incisive or poetic.

Manuel Almunia: 4
He did not drop the/
ball into his own net like/
Pepe Reina (twat.)

Bacary Sagna: 5
A Sagna suspect/
cross. A beauty to behold/
for Daniel Agger.

Laurent Koscielny: 6
Joe Cole nearly broke/
him. Sent him for an early bath/
by Sir Atkinson.

Thomas Vermaelen: 6
Agog at Ngog/
For Liverpool's opener.
Solid otherwise.

Gael Clichy: 5
Should be number three,/
but I did not really see/
him do much at all.

Jack Wilshere: 4
Jack passed the ball to/
the Liverpool attack. Well,/
that was a bit crap.

Abou Diaby: 5
Abou Diaby!/
Just a bit mediocre!/
Abou Diaby!

Emmanuel Eboue: 5
Some only came to/
see his dramatic sidesteps,/
comical fumbles.

Samir Nasri: 6
Some words of advice:/
When you're taking those free kicks,/
hit it over the wall.

Andrei Arshavin: 2
Small like this haiku/
About the same amount of/
quality also.

Marouane Chamakh: 6
Marouane Chamakh
was pretty good in attack.
A goal he did lack.

Substitutes: The three replacements, due to a lack of time on the pitch, only receive a micro-haiku (3,5,3) for their efforts.

Tomas Rosicky: 8
Flowing locks/
gone. Just like the boys/
of summer.

Theo Walcott: 4
Walcott, heed/
my words and take flight./
It's insane.

Robin van Persie: 5
R. V. P./
forget injury./
Smash the ball.

Liverpool 1 - 1 Arsenal: Who's Only Got Ten Men?

Oops! Pic via Sky Sports.

Liverpool 1: N'Gog 46

Arsenal 1: Reina 90 (og)

At one point during the latter stages of the match, our own Maxwell Foxman turned to me and said, "John, you've got that facial expression you get when you're mad." I can't say I was mad, exactly... it was more frustration and the feeling of oncoming despair. After the match, our own Jack Palmer sent me a text that said "Welcome back, Arsenal stress!"

Remember that time Pepe Reina had his arm around Cesc Fabregas while our captain was uncomfortably forced to wear a Barcelona shirt at the Spain World Cup celebration?

Karma's a bitch, isn't it?

Fabregas was not available for the Gunners on Merseyside while Robin van Persie and Alex Song were unable to start; this gave Jack Wilshere his first Premier League start for Arsenal and put Samir Nasri, Andrei Arshavin, and Emmanuel Eboue as the three midfielders behind Marouane Chamakh.

Arsenal controlled much of the opening half in classic Arsenal style, that is to say, there was a lot of calm and controlled possession with absolutely nothing to show for it. Aside from a Thomas Vermaelen free kick in the early going, there was very little to challenge Pepe Reina.

Liverpool came close to opening the scoring late in the half. In the 44th minute, a Glen Johnson shot forced Manuel Almunia into a brilliant save and after a the corner kick, a shot seemed destined for the low left goal post, but Gael Clichy blocked the shot away on the line. A minute later, an ill-timed but not ill-intentioned scissoring tackle from Joe Cole on Laurent Koscielny saw the former Chelsea man shown a straight red card. Initial reports looked bad; Arsene Wenger was told by the physios that Koscielny might have broken a bone. With Johan Djourou already hurt, Arsenal would be down to one center back with the new signing out.

Koscielny appeared fine to start the second half, but the back four wasn't quite there in every sense of the term after the restart. An Andrei Arshavin pass went astray and eluded both Jack Wilshere and Samir Nasri and landed at the feet of Javier Mascherano. His pass fed David N'Gog, Arsenal's defense allowed him all of the time and space in the world, and N'Gog fired a brilliant strike past the arms of Almunia and into the top of the net. Liverpool was on ten men, but after 58 seconds of play in the second half, they were up 1-0.

The goal deflated Arsenal quite a bit and Liverpool stunningly dominated play for the first 20-30 minutes of the second half, a worrying concept considering the Gunners' man advantage during this time. A double substitution just before the hour mark brought on Tomas Rosicky and Theo Walcott in exchange for Wilshere and Eboue. Arsenal began regaining some possession around this point and after the 70 minute mark began having a few better looks at the goal. Robin van Persie appeared in the 76th for Abou Diaby and he added some spark, despite not looking 100%.

Rosicky had a powerful strike tipped over the bar by Reina, then a scramble around the goal line brought nothing; it appeared Arsenal's goal wasn't coming. Then in the 90th, Rosicky received the ball on the left wing after a throw-in and sent a cross into the box. It appeared Reina would have the cross controlled, but he was beaten in the air by Chamakh, whose header clanged off the bottom of the left post and was headed right back into the arms of the waiting Reina. But Reina could not control the ball and he fumbled it into his own goal. Final minute of normal time and Arsenal was level.

Manuel Almunia was forced into a brilliant save on a Steven Gerrard free kick in the 93rd to keep the match level. It was a well taken strike and would have been a heartbreaking result for the Gunners just minutes after they had been gifted an equalizer. But in bad news, Laurent Koscielny was shown two yellow cards in injury time, the second being a fairly ridiculously ruled intentional handball. The having one center back fear is now back, as Koscielny will now serve a one match ban.

Chamakh and Koscielny generally had strong debuts for Arsenal; Jack Wilshere was solid but doesn't seem ready to start for us on a weekly basis; Manuel Almunia had no major disasters but still doesn't instill any needed confidence in goal; the back four as a whole appeared lost at times, especially Gael Clichy in the second half; Andrei Arshavin was dreadful, but I have the feeling he's playing hurt; and, a difficult fixture is out of the way with a point while missing Fabregas.

Preview: Liverpool v. Arsenal

The Diminutive Russian scored this many at Anfield in April 2009. Pic via Daily Mail.

Anfield, Liverpool

Sunday, August 15

16:00 BST, 11:00 a.m. EDT

• Referee: Martin Atkinson
• This Match, Last Year: Liverpool 1 - 2 Arsenal
• All-Time in All Competitions: 74 Arsenal wins, 81 Liverpool wins, 53 draws
• Arsenal's End of 2009/10 Form: W-L-L-D-L-W
• Liverpool's End of 2009/10 Form: D-D-W-W-L-D

Predicted Line-Up

guesses in red

Almunia

Sagna - Koscielny - Vermaelen - Clichy

Wilshere - Nasri - Diaby

Walcott - Chamakh - Arshavin

Subs from: Fabianski, Gibbs, Frimpong, Eboué, Denílson, Rosický, Vela
Doubts: Denílson (abdomen), Diaby (calf), Fàbregas (match fitness), Van Persie (match fitness)

Out: Song (calf), Djourou (hamstring), Bendtner (groin), Ramsey (leg)

Arsenal News and Notes

• Alex Song is 95% expected to be out with a calf problem and may not make the trip to Anfield.
• Denilson faces a fitness test on Friday or Saturday, as does Abou Diaby, though the latter has returned to full training.
• Cesc Fabregas and Robin van Persie are yet to return to match fitness after their trip to the World Cup final. Even though Spain thought it was fine to play Cesc for 45 minutes in Mexico on Wednesday. Thanks, Spain. They are not necessarily out.
• Jack Wilshere made his debut for England on Wednesday, but was limited to ten minutes of playing time, because apparently he was hospitalized on Tuesday with stomach pains. Well, that's a new one... Arsenal players will never cease to pick up weird injuries...
• Andrei Arshavin has been dealing with an unspecified muscular problem, but should be available.
• Nicklas Bendtner's remains out with recurrent groin problems and Aaron Ramsey's still out with his broken leg; he could be back by November.
• After conceding a late equalizer to drop points at Birmingham City in March, Arsenal only won two of their last eight matches last season, across all competitions.

Liverpool News and Notes

• A disappointing 7th place finish in the league last year dropped the Reds into the third qualifying round of the UEFA Europa League. They defeated FK Rabotnički 4-0 on aggregate and have drawn Turkish side Trabzonspor in the upcoming play-off round.
• Striker Fernando Torres is a doubt to appear in the side on Sunday with a groin strain which he's suffered from on and off since before Christmas. He has not been ruled out, though the Liverpool physios have stated that it's probably too early for him to return.
• This is Liverpool's first league match under new manager Roy Hodgson. Arsenal's last league match last year was against Roy Hodgson as well, while he was with Fulham.

Match Facts

• In all time league matches between the two in Liverpool, the Reds have won 48 of them while Arsenal have won just 22. 16 were drawn.
• In this fixture last year, Arsenal trailed 1-0 at halftime after a lackluster 45 minutes, Arsene Wenger screamed at the team in the interim, then the Gunners leveled on a Glen Johnson own goal and won on a beautiful strike from Andrei Arshavin.
• Arsenal also defeated Liverpool twice at the Emirates last year; 2-1 in the Carling Cup and 1-0 in league play.
• Liverpool's last win over Arsenal knocked the Gunners out of the 2008 Champions League, with the winning goal coming on a penalty in the 86th minute of the second leg. This came two minutes after Emmanuel Adebayor put Arsenal ahead on away goals.
  

Referee

• The referee is Martin Atkinson.
• Last year, he was the only referee to show an Arsenal player a red card; that was Thomas Vermaelen, sent off for a last man foul in a 2-0 win against West Ham.
• Atkinson also worked a 1-0 Arsenal win at Fulham, the FA Cup loss at Stoke City, and the 2-1 loss at Blackburn in May.
• Liverpool won only one match with Atkinson as the referee last year, while they lost two and drew three.

Around the League

• Saturday: Tottenham Hotspur v. Manchester City; White Hart Lane, London
• Saturday: Aston Villa v. West Ham United; Villa Park, Birmingham
• Saturday: Blackburn Rovers v. Everton; Ewood Park, Blackburn
• Saturday: Bolton Wanderers v. Fulham; Reebok Stadium, Bolton
• Saturday: Sunderland v. Birmingham City; Stadium of Light, Sunderland
• Saturday: Wigan Athletic v. Blackpool; DW Stadium, Wigan
• Saturday: Wolverhampton Wanderers v. Stoke City; Molineux, Wolverhampton
• Saturday: Chelsea v. West Bromwich Albion; Stamford Bridge, London
• Monday: Manchester United v. Newcastle United; Old Trafford, Manchester

REDAction Source: Arsenal to Open 2010/11 Season at Anfield

Actually, I'd like some time to myself, thank you very much.

According to REDAction, one of their sources have informed them that Arsenal will open their 2010/11 Premier League campaign with one of the more difficult matches on the list, Liverpool away at Anfield.

The fixture list is officially released by the Premier League tomorrow morning, at 9 a.m. BST, so we'll know then whether or not this rumor is true.

[via REDAction on Facebook]

Can You Name the Four Teams That Don't Like This Idea?

The Premier League is considering holding a four-team playoff for their final Champions League spot, contested by teams placed fourth through seventh, instead of awarding it to the team in fourth place. [Guardian]

Arsenal 1 - 0 Liverpool: What Is This Strange Feeling?

Diaby! (Diaby!) Diaby! (Diaby!) Pic via Guardian.

Arsenal 1: Diaby 72
Liverpool 0

Well, this is a feeling I haven't felt in a while. Arsenal came out of a game with all three points! But, let's not kid ourselves, this game was incredibly ugly. As it's getting late, I'll keep this recap short:

• For a fan that can be as cynical as I can, much of this game was hilarious.
• I'm sorry, did two separate Arsenal players completely fall over the ball while not even being challenged? The answer is yes.
• I wanted to tear my hair out at least ten times today.
• Skrtel? N'Gog? We decided that Liverpool's squad is largely composed of Pokemon.
• Arsenal's goal came off a fairly un-Arsenal series of plays, with Diaby's header coming off a Rosicky cross.
• Looking for an insurance goal afterward? Bendtner was replaced by Sagna, slipping Arsenal back into their 4-6-0 nonsense formation.
• Speaking of Bendtner, that was, in fact, a dive worthy of the Olympics.
• Said another Gooner at Nevada Smith's after that comment from me: "Yeah, on a team of synchronized swimmers."
• I thought Manuel Almunia had an alright game. I'm preparing for the apocalypse.
• Tom Vermaelen had a black eye. We assumed the entire team got into a brawl last night. Amongst themselves. Arshavin was making faces in the corner.
  
• Having not noticed that Samir Nasri took a knock to the head (and eventually left with a mild concussion), Max and I noticed that he looked incredibly hungover.
• Very little of this has had anything to do with the game, because it was that kind of game. Brutal to watch unless you're adept at being sarcastic.
• Which I'm conveniently great at!

And now, a week off, thanks to our graceful exit from the FA Cup, then it's off to Portugal for the Champions League next Wednesday.

Preview: Arsenal v. Liverpool

Arsenal's December win at Anfield was a turning point. They could really use another one of those. Pic via Guardian.

Emirates Stadium, London
Wednesday, February 10
1945 GMT, 2:45 pm EST

• Referee: Howard Webb
  
• This Match, Last Year: Arsenal 1 - 1 Liverpool
  
• Arsenal's Recent Form: D-W-W-D-L-L
• Liverpool's Recent Form: W-D-W-D-W-W
  

Predicted Line-Up
guesses italicized

Almunia
Sagna - Gallas - Vermaelen - Clichy
Fabregas - Song - Diaby
Nasri - Bendtner - Arshavin

Subs from: Fabianski, Traore, Campbell, Rosicky, Ramsey, Eboue, Walcott
Out: Merida (ankle), Vela (knee), Eduardo (hamstring), Gibbs (foot), Van Persie (ankle), Djourou (knee)

• CAN WE PLEASE START BENDTNER THIS TIME!?!
• Not sure how many games Arsenal expects to win if they keep playing their highly unorthodox 4-6-0 line-up.
  
• Eduardo will not return tomorrow, but should feature next Wednesday at F.C. Porto.
• There's no other injury news. That's kind of startling.
  
• Arsenal is unbeaten in its last 11 home matches against Liverpool in all competitions.
• Arsenal themselves are winless in its last four in all competitions and have scored twice in that span.
• A loss would make three straight league defeats for the Gunners for the first time since April 2007.
• This is the third time Arsenal have lost consecutive league games this season.
• Liverpool are unbeaten in their last seven league matches.
• Liverpool have kept four consecutive clean sheets.
• In their last five away from Anfield, however, they have won one, drawn three, and lost at Portsmouth.
  
• Arsene Wenger still has 299 career Premier League wins.
• Liverpool will be without Fernando Torres (knee), Yossi Benayoun (rib), Glen Johnson (knee), and Alberto Aquilani (illness).